The devil wanted a place on earth -- 
Sort of a summer home -- 
A place to spend his vacation 
Whenever he wanted to roam. 

So, he picked out Texas, 
A place both wretched and rough, 
Where the climate was to his liking, 
And the cowboys were hardened and tough. 

He dried up the streams in the canyons 
And ordered no rains to fall. 
He dried up the lakes in the valleys, 
Then baked and scorched it all. 

Then, over his barren country 
He transplanted shrubs from hell 
The cactus, thistle, and prickly pear, 
The climate suited them well. 

Now, the home was much to his liking 
But animal life he had none. 
So, he created crawling creatures 
That all mankind would shun. 

First, he made a rattlesnake 
With its forked, poisonous tongue; 
Taught it to strike and rattle 
And how to swallow its young. 

Then, he made scorpions and lizards 
And the ugly old horned toad. 
He placed spiders of every description 
Under rocks by the side of the road. 

He ordered the sun to shine hotter -- 
Hotter and hotter still -- 
Until even the cactus wilted, 
And the old horned toad took ill. 

Then, he gazed on his earthly kingdom, 
As any creature would. 
He chuckled a little up his sleeve 
And admitted that it was good. 

'Twas summer, now, and Satan lay 
By a prickly pear to rest. 
The sweat rolled off his sweaty brow, 
So he took off his coat and vest. 

"By Golly," he finally panted, 
"I did my job too well. 
I'm going back to where I came from -- 
Texas is hotter than hell!