* Never slap a man who's chewin' tobacco.
* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in.
* If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
* Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
* There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.
* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
* Don't squat with your spurs on.
* Always drink upstream from the herd.
There are three kinds of people:
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